Our quiz asks: could you cut it with the meejah elite?
We’ve all seen them – the lawyers hailing cabs to Hoxton, punching deals into their Android-powered tablets and Facebooking their pinterests via i-berries. Media lawyers are always very stylish, and ‘here and now’. But do you have what it takes to join their ranks?
1. Your grandmother recently died, and you had to address the mourners at her funeral. Was your tribute:
a) Sombre and respectful – after all, decorum matters on these occasions.
b) Light-hearted and celebratory – it’s what she would have wanted.
c) Compressed via a VP8 codec and live-streamed from Cannes to a Google TV at 2.5 Mbit/s.
2. What did you think of the Leveson Report?
a) It was a thorough, sensible response to a uniquely problematic set of circumstances.
b) It was a missed opportunity to realign government-press relations once and for all.
c) You have no idea, having given up reading after the first 140 characters.
3. Troilus and Cressida are…
a) Characters in a poem by Geoffrey Chaucer.
b) Characters in a play by William Shakespeare.
c) Your children.
4. ‘Designed by Renzo Piano, towering 95 stories above London and valued at approximately £2.5 billion.’ What are we talking about?
a) Don’t know.
b) The Shard.
c) Your spectacles.
5. Who is your ideal client?
a) A large corporate with bottomless pockets.
b) A well-managed charity that understands it does not operate in a moral vacuum.
c) A sixty year-old rock star who rides into the office on a swan and lies on the meeting room floor inhaling industrial quantities of gak off a transvestite’s bottom.
How did you answer?
Sorry, but it doesn’t look good. You’re not very media at all. You probably spend your time reading newspapers, posting letters and going to actual parties, you anachronistic loser, you.
Not bad – you probably know the difference between Twitters and Load-downs. But you’re not quite there yet. Maybe step up by cancelling your holiday in Provence and spending a fortnight in Second Life instead?
Congratulations! You were made to be a Media Lawyer. Time to change your profile photo to an avatar and download an app that’ll sing lullabies to your children whilst you’re stuck in the office Skyping LA. AB