Take your partners

October 17, 2014

Is your partner conference in the same league as Bakers’?

London’s Grosvenor House, one home of the Bakers shindig. Photo: JWMarriott

Partner conferences seem to be getting increasingly lavish. As reported in The Lawyer this week, the Bakers conference in London involved about 1500 people and cost a whopping £3m. Then you’ve got DLA Piper hiring the world’s second largest cruise ship, and the rumour recently confirmed that the next Freshfields conference will actually take place in a specially built golden palace on the moon. You’ve got to ask yourself: how does your own conference compare? As ever, our quizzage = answers.

 

1.    What kind of accommodation are we talking about?

a)    You’ve hired three tip-top London hotels: The Grosvenor House, the Park Lane Hilton and the Intercontinental

b)    You’ve hired one middle-ranking London hotel, somewhere in Hammersmith

c)    You’ve hired no hotel at all as visiting partners are expected to stay with host families, a bit like French exchanges at school

 

2.    There’s a soccer event lined up as part of the conference. What is it?

a)    A World Cup competition at Wembley Stadium, home of football

b)    An FA Cup competition at The Valley, home of Charlton Athletic

c)    A blow football competition at 6 Maple Street, home of that big bloke from IT support

 

3.    How might spouses expect to be entertained whilst partners are working?

a)    Jogging in Hyde Park

b)    Blogging in Bloomsbury Park

c)    Dogging in Manor Park

 

4.    During the course of the conference, the firm’s Chairman was interviewed by:

a)    The Lawyer

b)    Solicitors Journal

c)    The police

 

5.    Consensus suggests the highlight of the week is:

a)    A plenary in The Grosvenor House

b)    A penne in the Spaghetti House

c)    A reverie in a bawdy house

 

6.    Finally, there’s a big gala dinner to mark the end of the conference. Where is it?

a)    The Natural History Museum, in the shadow of the Diplodocus

b)    The Cutty Sark Museum, in the shadow of the three great masts

c)    The Museum of Croydon, in the shadow of an indecent exposure charge

 

How did you do?

Mostly As:

Congratulations! You work at Baker & McKenzie. As befits one of the great global law firms, your conference makes Belshazzar’s Feast look like a snatched breakfast at Julie’s Pantry.

Mostly Bs:

Not bad. You work for a pretty normal firm. Not quite Baker & McKenzie, but not quite Barry McKenzie either.

Mostly Cs:

Oops. Your conference is terrible. Your firm has about as much style as Nigel Farage on a walking holiday. Best move firms: and you can start by looking here.

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